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 Watching Movies Alone with crumbsroom 
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Have you seen the short doc about Henry Miller's bathroom by Tom Schiller?




Sun Apr 29, 2018 11:09 am
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crumbsroom wrote:
MUSIC, SEX, VIOLENCE AND THE BENEFITS OF MAYBE NOT LOOKING AWAY


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Movie: The Fan
Director: Eckhart Schmidt
What's Worth Talking About: The dangers of listening to music made by German New-Wave dorks



For those who live in Toronto, this film is by miraculous coincidence being shown at the Royal next month. New pristine transfer. Book your seats in advance before it inevitably sells out. Don't get caught out in the rain like you did for the Yayoi Kusama exhibit.


Wed May 02, 2018 12:50 am
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I made a primo Yayoi Kusama / Avengers joke on Facebook the other day, only to realize nobody outside Toronto would get it, haha.

Also, is the Royal the one where they have the burlesque showings or some shit? I keep seeing Facebook posts to that effect, and I never follow up on any of them because I just want to watch a movie, dammit.

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Wed May 02, 2018 2:21 am
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Rock wrote:
I made a primo Yayoi Kusama / Avengers joke on Facebook the other day, only to realize nobody outside Toronto would get it, haha.

Also, is the Royal the one where they have the burlesque showings or some shit? I keep seeing Facebook posts to that effect, and I never follow up on any of them because I just want to watch a movie, dammit.


My goal here in this thread is clearly to narrow my audience to that of one. If making an topical reference to an art show in Toronto is what it takes, so be it.

I've only gone to the Royal for movies but I do think they sometimes have extracurricular things going on. I guess you got to do whatever it takes to keep a rep cinema alive. I know I've seen a lot of really good things there, even if it isn't the most kept up of places. Like Prom Night, with cast members from the original taking all of your questions. You can imagine how exciting that was. And no it wasn't the C Grade Travolta stud, because then I wouldn't have to be sarcastic about my excitement.


Thu May 03, 2018 5:06 am
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Jinnistan wrote:
Have you seen the short doc about Henry Miller's bathroom by Tom Schiller?




I keep planning on watching this, but life just keeps interrupting.


Thu May 03, 2018 5:07 am
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crumbsroom wrote:
I keep planning on watching this, but life just keeps interrupting.

Just pinch it off already!


Thu May 03, 2018 7:31 am
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crumbsroom wrote:
Movie: The Fan
Director: Eckhart Schmidt


Just wanted to say this was a great read. Nice work.

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Thu May 03, 2018 11:02 am
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I had posted Sun City Girls' indie film Cloaven Theater in my old jazz thread, but I thought you might like their other film here:



Sat May 05, 2018 1:54 pm
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Captain Terror wrote:

Just wanted to say this was a great read. Nice work.


Thanks, good sir.


Sun May 06, 2018 6:33 am
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Hey, crumb. Good job bringing down the Corrie. Let's do this.


Sun May 06, 2018 12:37 pm
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Jinnistan wrote:
Hey, crumb. Good job bringing down the Corrie. Let's do this.


It's almost as if Leaves doesn't think there is enough room here for a few more self-absorbed, long-winded cranks.


Mon May 07, 2018 10:44 am
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crumbsroom wrote:

It's almost as if Leaves doesn't think there is enough room here for a few more self-absorbed, long-winded cranks.
Long-winded cranks, you say?

*cracks knuckles*

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Mon May 07, 2018 10:45 am
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This piece of shit is honestly one of the best horror movies I've seen in a while.


Mon May 07, 2018 12:28 pm
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I like how it says 'strong' uncut version. That alone sells it for me.


Mon May 07, 2018 12:34 pm
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ski petrol wrote:
I like how it says 'strong' uncut version. That alone sells it for me.


This was important for me too.


Mon May 07, 2018 12:38 pm
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crumbsroom wrote:

It's almost as if Leaves doesn't think there is enough room here for a few more self-absorbed, long-winded cranks.

I only wish that I've seen more good films recently to write about.


Mon May 07, 2018 1:08 pm
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Jinnistan wrote:
I only wish that I've seen more good films recently to write about.


Clearly you haven't watched Suffer Little Children. Shot directly on video, written by children, inaudible dialogue, long ponderous scenes of people drinking coffee, moments of static between edits, all building up to a payoff that makes every minute of this shit worth it.


Tue May 08, 2018 12:19 am
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crumbsroom wrote:
Clearly you haven't watched Suffer Little Children. Shot directly on video, written by children, inaudible dialogue, long ponderous scenes of people drinking coffee, moments of static between edits, all building up to a payoff that makes every minute of this shit worth it.

I have not. Your video store source should look into starting its own streaming service for these kinds of out-of-print delicacies.

No, I'm stuck with Prime, and Baba Yaga, Poliziotti Violenti and The Bermuda Triangle (the latter being one of the worst post-Jaws rip-offs I can think of). Baba Yaga's not too bad at all, actually, I just can't think of anything to say about it that would be worth reading. I also saw Blood For Blood, which is basically Ernest Borgnine vs. Michael J. Pollard in some kind of flea market knock-off of Straw Dogs. 'Sounds amazing', you say? Yeah, not quite. And it also has a literally corny soundtrack aboout how God spreads his seed. I can't honestly recommend it. I won't.


Tue May 08, 2018 11:24 am
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crumbsroom wrote:

Clearly you haven't watched Suffer Little Children. Shot directly on video, written by children, inaudible dialogue, long ponderous scenes of people drinking coffee, moments of static between edits, all building up to a payoff that makes every minute of this shit worth it.

The top two IMDb user reviews look to be written by people who were in the movie, which is strangely endearing.

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Tue May 08, 2018 11:47 am
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Rock wrote:
The top two IMDb user reviews look to be written by people who were in the movie, which is strangely endearing.
I think the best part is that even they can't bring themselves to give it anything above a 5/10 rating.

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Tue May 08, 2018 11:51 am
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BL wrote:
I think the best part is that even they can't bring themselves to give it anything above a 5/10 rating.


Like most of the SOV (shot of video) films that work, it functions mostly as outsider art. They would seriously test the patience of anyone expecting a movie with proper narrative beats, comprehensible editing or any facade of professionalism. They also really aren't tailor made for 'so bad it's good' movie fans either, making it understandable that almost no one on earth would actually like them beyond those drawn to the most primitive kind of art. Those doubtful of the films merits would understandably include the kids who got roped into creating such a spectacle, who probably would be baffled that anyone could like it who wasn't tethered to the film by the nostalgia of making it. The movie is a hard sell for sure, but for those who stick it out through the more patience trying moments, moments of overwhelmingly confounding brilliance begin to shine through, regardless of how stupid and bad it all ultimately is. You can't possibly make this shit up, unless of course, you have no idea what you are doing in the first place.


Tue May 08, 2018 10:57 pm
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Crack team of muscle men go into a forest to fight a robot.

The very premise of this movie is foolproof. Of course it's amazing.


Fri May 11, 2018 12:43 pm
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I watched The Student Teachers, and I can guess what you're thinking. But no.

The film was billed as a horror film, about a pervert at a high school in a clown mask killing women. This is interesting in part because this was 1974 before the teen slasher genre jump-started with Black Christmas and Halloween. It was directed by Jonathan Kaplan, who would go on to make accomplished films like Over The Edge and The Accused. And, not likely least, thespian Dick Miller plays the killer and a substitute health class teacher. ("That's a question for your priest, not your teacher!")

Sorry for the spoiler, but the reason is because the true spoiler is that the film's slasher plot is only about 1/4 of the film, and is dispensed with very shoddily. Most of the film is just a sex comedy, as the name and poster would imply, and ending in a left-turn diversion into a climax involving a group of students trying to rip off the local gang and mob with fake cocaine, leading to the kind of car chase romp you'd expect from....I'm going to say the Dukes of Hazard because for some reason the chase is scored to banjos.

Dick Miller deserves more than this. Also, for some reason, Chuck Norris shows up to teach karate. Trust me, this is not a recommendation.


Fri May 11, 2018 1:07 pm
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Jinnistan wrote:
Trust me, this is not a recommendation.


Of course it is.


Fri May 11, 2018 1:18 pm
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crumbsroom wrote:

Of course it is.

When the school bus full of kids running away from the blaxploitation gangsters that they sold fake coke to while banjos are giddily picked overhead, you may even realize how right I am and how diifficult it is for me to convince you by using this assortment of words. By then, Dick Miller's part of the film will be long gone, and the emptiness will settle.


Fri May 11, 2018 1:28 pm
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Jinnistan wrote:
When the school bus full of kids running away from the blaxploitation gangsters that they sold fake coke to while banjos are giddily picked overhead, you may even realize how right I am and how diifficult it is for me to convince you by using this assortment of words. By then, Dick Miller's part of the film will be long gone, and the emptiness will settle.


Sounds good. I'm especially looking forward to the part where the emptiness settles.


Fri May 11, 2018 1:33 pm
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I consider this thread to be a safe space so imagine my concern upon finding anti-banjo-car-chase rhetoric.

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Fri May 11, 2018 10:43 pm
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There is a scene in the Dylan documentary Don't Look Back where Donovan Leitch comes into Dylan's hotel room, plays a very nice song, gets some applause by those listening, then hands his guitar to Dylan. Dylan then plays a new song of his own in rebuttal, "It's All Over Now, Baby Blue", the greatness of which seems to light Bob up in the delight of making everything Donovan just sung seem completely irrelevant.

This leads us to watching the devastation of Donovan's son starring opposite a young Brad Pitt in late 80's slasher/comedy Cutting Classes. But Brad Pitt hardly needs to pen a "Baby Blue" to show up this upstart for the no talent cunt he is. Brad Pitt just needs his dimples, and Donovan's son will just go sputtering off into irrelevancy with a spectacularly uncharasmitic and untalented performance. He is the absolute worst. Thank God he soon gave up acting and formed some band with the son of Mickey Dolenz, or Peter Tork, or some kind of nobody, to make ammends for this awfulness. Now if only he could also start making amends for that.

Leitch's acting aside though, this is an entirely passable, sort of entertaining diversion. And it also stars Martin Mull and Roddy McDowell, so it has that going for it as well.


Sat May 12, 2018 11:41 am
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crumbsroom wrote:
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There is a scene in the Dylan documentary Don't Look Back where Donovan Leitch comes into Dylan's hotel room, plays a very nice song, gets some applause by those listening, then hands his guitar to Dylan. Dylan then plays a new song of his own in rebuttal, "It's All Over Now, Baby Blue", the greatness of which seems to light Bob up in the delight of making everything Donovan just sung seem completely irrelevant.

This leads us to watching the devastation of Donovan's son starring opposite a young Brad Pitt in late 80's slasher/comedy Cutting Classes. But Brad Pitt hardly needs to pen a "Baby Blue" to show up this upstart for the no talent cunt he is. Brad Pitt just needs his dimples, and Donovan's son will just go sputtering off into irrelevancy with a spectacularly uncharasmitic and untalented performance. He is the absolute worst. Thank God he soon gave up acting and formed some band with the son of Mickey Dolenz, or Peter Tork, or some kind of nobody, to make ammends for this awfulness. Now if only he could also start making amends for that.

Leitch's acting aside though, this is an entirely passable, sort of entertaining diversion. And it also stars Martin Mull and Roddy McDowell, so it has that going for it as well.


Cutting Class is incredibly entertaining. At times it borders on parody, in my opinion (such as the solving a two trains math problem scene). There's the part where Leitch appears in the main girl's bathroom, but then hands her a towel and she (and the movie) are like "Maybe he's not so bad!", as if showing up in a woman's bathroom while she's bathing and eventually handing her a towel is some sort of gentlemanly act. Or the sodium/rock mixup. Or the wacky adventures of someone who has been shot by an arrow. Or the scene with the vice--"Lefty loosey, righty tighty!!!!".

It's one that I watch every few years and it never fails to put a smile on my face. Yeah--I own this movie.


Sat May 12, 2018 12:01 pm
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Takoma1 wrote:

Cutting Class is incredibly entertaining. At times it borders on parody, in my opinion (such as the solving a two trains math problem scene). There's the part where Leitch appears in the main girl's bathroom, but then hands her a towel and she (and the movie) are like "Maybe he's not so bad!", as if showing up in a woman's bathroom while she's bathing and eventually handing her a towel is some sort of gentlemanly act. Or the sodium/rock mixup. Or the wacky adventures of someone who has been shot by an arrow. Or the scene with the vise--"Lefty loosey, righty tighty!!!!".

It's one that I watch every few years and it never fails to put a smile on my face. Yeah--I own this movie.


While you almost certainly like it more than me, it's one of those rare forgotten movies that is actually watchable front to back. You don't have to wade through a bunch of painful scenes to get to good parts. It is consistently decent all the way through. Never particularly great, but I paid it enough respect to pay attention. Which is something.

Except for Leitch. Ugh. Just so much ugh.

Ugh.


Sat May 12, 2018 12:07 pm
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crumbsroom wrote:

While you almost certainly like it more than me, it's one of those rare forgotten movies that is actually watchable front to back. You don't have to wade through a bunch of painful scenes to get to good parts. It is consistently decent all the way through. Never particularly great, but I paid it enough respect to pay attention. Which is something.

Except for Leitch. Ugh. Just so much ugh.

Ugh.


I find it enjoyably ridiculous. Like the coach bouncing on the trampoline--the whole movie is weird and has this off-kilter vibe to it that pulls it out of being forgettable. I mean: Brad Pitt's head in a vice!


Sat May 12, 2018 12:12 pm
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Takoma1 wrote:
(such as the solving a two trains math problem scene).


I will say that this scene was a highlight.


Sat May 12, 2018 12:13 pm
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Takoma1 wrote:

I find it enjoyably ridiculous. Like the coach bouncing on the trampoline--the whole movie is weird and has this off-kilter vibe to it that pulls it out of being forgettable. I mean: Brad Pitt's head in a vice!


Coach on a trampoline is another good point. But you are undermining my hatred of Donovan Leitch. How dare you.


Sat May 12, 2018 12:15 pm
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Sat May 12, 2018 12:35 pm
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Ah, Jill Schoelen. So many promising young 80s actresses who inexplicably peter out, treated like day-old donuts by the Weinsteins of the industry. I remember her most fondly from The Stepfather.


Sun May 13, 2018 12:43 pm
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This "homebaked" indie cult film provides a snapshot into mid-70s New York City, but not the gritty mean streets or Times Square squalor of your Scorsese, Lumet, Cassavetes, but rather the more freaky Village vibe downtown. Peppered with the local flavors, some which would become Letterman staples (Brother Theodore, Larry Bud Melman) and others would transcend this rooftop art (Veronica Hamel, above, as the falcon-lady) into more prominent careers. At the center is Tony Azito, an Off-Broadway legend, but here that theatrical approach comes across more like a hammy amateur. He seems to be enjoying himself, but his Harpo/Keaton/Chaplin shtick gets a little grating by the time he's slapping food on people. The main gist, as far as I can tell, is that he faked his death and yada yada. The film has its charms. Not least of which is its grand 15+ minute street dance climax, a solid funk jam from the Hall & Oates band, that manages to be more impressive than anything from Godspell or The Wiz (in terms of 70s urban musicals). It's a film that's hard to hate.


Sun May 13, 2018 1:14 pm
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Never underestimate Al Adamson's taste for the grotesquely dull. Sure, the black and white Filipino movie he steals most of the scenes for his Horror of the Blood Monsters has its moments. Men dressed in paper mache Lobster costumes bobbing around in a creek waiting for prey might sort of be one of them. Watching dwarfs dressed as bats spelunking through caves and landing on overweight men in loincloths might be another. It wouldn't make sense if there wasn't at least something half decent here, right? This is, after all, a movie principally about vampire cavemen and all of the non-vampire cavemen they can't help but harass with all of their standard blood sucking bullshit. It's a good start, even if we will hardly be introduced to any of these characters as they run around empty fields chasing each other. But at least the movie will be wise enough to make it clear who the vampires here are. They are the ones who have what look like babycorns dangling from their lip. These are the bad guys. Thankfully their teeth are prominent enough that you can even tell from a distance which of them are worthy of running away from, which helps since you would otherwise have no idea what is happening in all of the long shots the movie is composed of. It mainly just looks like shapes lumbering through the grass, and without the occasional glimpse of these big dumb teeth, it would be anyone's guess what the hell they are all in such a rush for.

Feeling that all of this wasn't quite enough to entice American audiences though, Adamson will then cocoon all of these scenes inside of a dinky science fiction movie that he himself directed. This part will mostly consists of a crack team of astronauts landing on this prehistoric planet and watching all of these above described caveman adventures from a distance. You know, just like the audience will be doing as they squint their eyes to make out which indistinguishable figure has got the teeth were supposed to be wary of. To ensure some acting gravitas he keeps silver screen legend John Carradine propped up in a space chair for the entirity of the film, completely removed from any action and barking orders at his team of astronauts. I assume they can hear him, and that he isn't just mumbling away to himself, wondering why he is in such an awful movie.

Pretty terrible.


Tue May 15, 2018 10:56 am
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Lance Henriksen is a great actor, one who may be taken a bit for granted due to his deceptively generous asking price and the glut of direct-to-video work that he accommodates. Here's a film that showcases the young actor's talents for playing a lost soul, appropriately obscured by time and technical limitations. The film is now listed as Winnipeg Run, named for the snowmobile race that Lance is devoted to winning, but IMDb still lists it under its original, less intriguing 1972 name, It Ain't Easy. There's not much else in terms of details. It apparently opened in Minnisota, no box office info available. (This interesting vintage snowmobile site has some news clippings about halfway down the page, fyi.) The print is pale pink and unrestored. The film, the sole effort from Maurice Hurley, is crude in a number of technical aspects. But Henriksen is there and willing, sad and weathered already, giving an excellent performance as a Vietnam vet off his meds and determined to find meaning to his life in a snowmobile race, a random and insignificant obsession. This forgotten film should be mandatory viewing for his fans.


Wed May 16, 2018 11:40 am
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It is the best movie.


Wed May 16, 2018 12:23 pm
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Wed May 16, 2018 1:11 pm
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crumbsroom wrote:
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Who would have ever thought that the cover art of that woman was basically totally accurate?


Thu May 17, 2018 10:41 am
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Takoma1 wrote:

Who would have ever thought that the cover art of that woman was basically totally accurate?
It's good to know at least one jurisdiction takes its truth-in-advertising laws seriously.

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Thu May 17, 2018 10:42 am
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Takoma1 wrote:

Who would have ever thought that the cover art of that woman was basically totally accurate?


The Blue Jean Monster would never lie to you. Everything on that poster happens in the movie...and more!!

So, so much more.


Thu May 17, 2018 11:07 am
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crumbsroom wrote:

The Blue Jean Monster would never lie to you. Everything on that poster happens in the movie...and more!!


Even lightning-hands-motorcycle-explosion?!

Even lightning-hands-motorcycle-explosion?!


Thu May 17, 2018 11:45 am
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Takoma1 wrote:

Who would have ever thought that the cover art of that woman was basically totally accurate?

I am perfectly happy with the in-movie representation of the poster. :D ;)


Thu May 17, 2018 12:19 pm
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Takoma1 wrote:

Even lightning-hands-motorcycle-explosion?!

Even lightning-hands-motorcycle-explosion?!


It might be lying about that.


Thu May 17, 2018 1:02 pm
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While I nearly feel it is doing chromosomal damage to my critical faculties to admit this, I was a pretty big fan of this one. Based on a book that I once revered, and now correctly realize as being hot garbage, I wasn't even sure there was any material to work with here to begin with. Not a good start. And the fact that trailers seemed to tease the movie would be going in the direction of virtually every other modern horror film I hate--everything based around slick, soulless and highly studied scares (never dread, never discomort, always something that can always wash off clean in the morning), all of it rendered in a filmmaking style devoid of any evidence of personality or insight into its world or characters--my body was aching to watch this just to justify my frustrations with everything Hollywood has done wrong with the genre the past ten (or probably more) years.

How surprsing then that I don't really have anything to be lashing out at here. This is not some groundbreaking movie, by any means, but for a movie that felt designed to get as many teenage asses into seats, the 1980's world it builds seems to have a tactile reality to it that just doesn't rely on decade specific name drops in hopes of cooing a feeling of warm nostalgia into the ears of its audience (I'm looking at you Stranger Things). This is a real place that these (fairly) real cast of outcast characters exist within and have been abandoned by. While arguments could be made that many of the characters could have been fleshed out more (the only one's that seem to be fully realized are Bev, Ben and possibly Bill), none of the other Losers necessarily feel like dead weight either, regardless of there not being enough time to tend to all of them (well, maybe Stan, but was he really even much of a thing in the book either?)

As for the horror elements of the film, these scenes really do feel as if they came directly from the worried and nervous psyches of children. Lepers, headless orphans, a nest of burning arms reaching from behind a door and, of course, a clown in a sewer don't feel simply like a list of weird adversaries the directors of tossing out at the audience, but instead all seem very much a part of the fabric of this realistically drawn world, regardless of the surreal nature of how each will suddenly intrude upon the day to day lives in it. Skarsgard's Pennywise is really the crown prince here of villains, as the movie needs him to be for it to work at all. I've always admired Curry's performance in the original (and awful) TV movie, but found his campy approach to really be more entertaining than frightening. Skarsgard's style though drips with menace, no matter how much he tries to turn all of his threats into punchlines. Much of this has to do with the manner in which he is often shot, disguised by shadows, frequently left in the background of scenes until the climax, but the work of the actor here should be applauded. Especially considering how funny (or frustrating) I was expecting him to fail.

This may all be a matter of low expectations of my part. But I really don't think so. I think this movie will stand up on repeat viewings and all of the successful horror darling directors of the past few years should be looking to this movie for guidance. You do not need to risk losing box office returns by making something a little more presentable than paranormal pablum. It will not stand very impressively alongside of the likes of It Follows, or The Witch, or The Babadook, but it similarly should not even in the same conversation as the Insidious' and Conjurings and Annabelle's of the world. It is simply a really solid and really entertaining middle ground horror film. And sometimes that is good enough.


Sun May 20, 2018 1:08 am
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crumbsroom wrote:
I've always admired Curry's performance in the original (and awful) TV movie, but found his campy approach to really be more entertaining than frightening. Skarsgard's style though drips with menace, no matter how much he tries to turn all of his threats into punchlines.

I had a different reaction to both. The "campy" parts of Curry's performance were, I felt, a bit necessary in order to believe how a child would have found him inviting enough to stop in the rain and chat with him in a sewer. Curry was more dynamic, able to switch from the playful, harmless clown that could earn a child's trust, and twisting into a rancid thing of terror. Skarsgard had the blessing of a much better funded FX department for the latter, but right from the opening I never felt Curry's warmth, and as such I couldn't believe that the brother didn't just run away instinctively from this weirdo sitting in a sewer grate in a downpour. Skarsgard didn't have Curry's seductive amiability. Instead, he was just creepy, almost always. And as a creep, he was very effective and scary in primal ways. But also in a strictly "do not touch" kind of way that even a child could understand. #zeldawisdom


Sun May 20, 2018 1:56 am
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Jinnistan wrote:
I had a different reaction to both. The "campy" parts of Curry's performance were, I felt, a bit necessary in order to believe how a child would have found him inviting enough to stop in the rain and chat with him in a sewer. Curry was more dynamic, able to switch from the playful, harmless clown that could earn a child's trust, and twisting into a rancid thing of terror. Skarsgard had the blessing of a much better funded FX department for the latter, but right from the opening I never felt Curry's warmth, and as such I couldn't believe that the brother didn't just run away instinctively from this weirdo sitting in a sewer grate in a downpour. Skarsgard didn't have Curry's seductive amiability. Instead, he was just creepy, almost always. And as a creep, he was very effective and scary in primal ways. But also in a strictly "do not touch" kind of way that even a child could understand. #zeldawisdom


Logistically, yes, I think the notion of Skarsgard's appearance and manner would hardly lure any child in close. Most obviously in the opening scene with Georgie. There is hardly any concern on the boys face as he comes upon this miraculously weird situation of a clown being trapped down a sidewalk grate. And as hard as it is to believe any child would reach in towards him, it is the barely concealed malevolence of the scene that makes it work for me, not in a way I understand a child would act like in the real world, but in the way we all can behave in a nightmare, where there can be almost a dark gravity that seems to compel us towards something that is clearly a danger. So while, yes, it doesn't really jive with the fairly realistic portrait of childhood in a small town the movie mostly sticks to, it is what gives the scene the horror of some kind of fate that can't be resisted, even when it is an evil that can hardly be bothered to disguise itself. It is usually how I like my horror, primitive, hardly based on the observable ways we really react, but instead the ways we worry we inexplicably might.


Sun May 20, 2018 2:24 am
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I mourn the fact that Tim Curry is very unlikely to have his renaissance. surely one of these new, young filmmakers would have found some sort of role for him had he not had that stroke.


Sun May 20, 2018 2:32 am
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