Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

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Rump
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Wed Jan 29, 2020 12:11 pm


57th
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Bratz (2007)

The most popular fashion dolls in America make the leap to the big screen in this live-action adventure that follows four diverse teenage girls who make the jump from middle school to high school, only to find that their four-part friendship doesn't fit into the rigid clique system at their new institution. Fed up with being torn apart, the girls each reject the their respective cliques and reclaim their own group where friendship takes precedence over popularity. Unfortunately, this causes the school's tyrannical student-body president to blow a gasket, and it looks like they'll have to fight hard for their place in the crowd.
5/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5neffSN1XPs

"Why does hollywood want to make us stupid and act like complete pussys?!? this movie is beyond godawful, it's acinide as hell and is the most torture you will ever have in a movie, " - IMDB
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Wed Jan 29, 2020 12:12 pm


56th
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Showtime (2002)

LAPD Detective Sergeant Mitch Preston cares only about doing his job and nailing crooks. LAPD Patrol Officer Trey Sellars joined the force as a day job until his acting career took off. During an undercover drug buy Mitch was working that Trey botched by calling in for backup and drawing media attention, Mitch's partner is shot with a very exotic 12-gauge automatic weapon; Mitch then shoots the video camera out of the hands of a reporter filming the action when the cameraman refused to shut it down. Faced with a $10 million lawsuit, the department agrees to let producer Chase Renzi film Mitch's investigation for a new reality TV show, and constantly tries to make everything more "viewer friendly" by changing everything about Mitch's life to fit the stereotypical view of police officers--and partners him with Trey.
5/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DIXl1mQcQ4I

"I *hated* Showtime. It was ninety minutes of life-force-draining shlock that made me depressed and p***ed off for the rest of the day. I only spent $5.75, but that was at least $5.74 too much. " - IMDB
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Wed Jan 29, 2020 12:25 pm


55th
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Critters 4 (1992)

Just before bounty hunter Charile triggers his gun to destroy the last two Critter-eggs, he gets a message that it would be illegal to extinguish the race from the galaxy. He's sent a transporter where he puts the eggs - unfortunately the transporter takes him with it and then gets lost in space. After 53 deep-frozen years, he's found by a private wreckage collector team under the unscrupulous Rick. On behalf of the mighty company Terracor they bring him to an empty space station - but Rick is curious and opens the box... so Charlie has work again, to keep the Critters from eating everybody.
5/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JHUXtHt7hXw

Worth watching for Bassett and Dourif's "Ain't no mountain high enough" sing off ;)
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Wed Jan 29, 2020 12:37 pm


54th
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Girls Just Want To Have Fun (1985)

Janey is new in town and soon meets Lynne, who shares her passion for dancing in general and "Dance TV" in particular. When a competition is announced to find a new Dance TV regular couple, Janey and Lynne are determined to audition. The only problem is that Janey's father doesn't approve of that kind of thing.
5/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hyQmsqs5jus

"No one could like this movie, not even Helen Hunt's mom." - IMDB
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Apex Predator » Wed Jan 29, 2020 8:11 pm

Will largely concur on Showtime.

William Shatner helps (a bit) but I swear that they meant a younger actor for Eddie's role. Not even Rene Russo can keep this one interesting.
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Torgo » Wed Jan 29, 2020 8:36 pm

Guess I'll hold of on seeing Ad Astra. It's disappointing to hear that's it's a whiny daddy issues movie.
Last Great Movie Seen
Road House (Herrington, 1989)
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Thu Jan 30, 2020 2:35 pm


53rd
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C.H.U.D 2: Bud the Chud (1989)

A couple of teenagers break into a secret government science lab and steal a frozen corpse for a high school prank and accidentally awaken the corpse which turns out to be a CHUD, ironically named Bud, who goes on a killing spree and making his victims also cannibalistic CHUD's and its up to the teens to stop him.
5/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nv1_Ig58V2Y

D.P. :up:
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Thu Jan 30, 2020 2:47 pm


52nd
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Bloody Chainsaw Girl (2016)

One day, Giko Nokomura (Rio Uchida), a delinquent schoolgirl, comes to school to make her mock-up exam. On her way she is ambushed and ends up fighting some mutant cyborg classmates, beating them all skillfully with her chainsaw. These classmates were turned into mutant cyborgs by Nero Aoi (Mari Yamachi), a fellow classmate and crazy scientist. As the homeroom teacher barricades himself against Nero and classmates are out to defeat Giko, a confrontation between Giko and Nero, who wants to turn Giko as well, is bound to happen.
5/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mjppLt6lwXw

"Adds little that we haven't seen before in trashy Asian exploitation cinema (most notably, bizarre mutants with weird weaponry, cheesy gore effects, and the occasional up-skirt shot)." - IMDB
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Thu Jan 30, 2020 2:58 pm


51st
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Cop Out (2010)

After a clumsy operation trying to capture a drug dealer, the N.Y.P.D Detectives Jimmy Monroe and Paul Hodges are suspended for one month by their Captain Romans. Jimmy decides to sell his rare baseball card to pay for his daughter's expensive wedding while his jealous partner believes that his wife is cheating on him with their next-door neighbor. When Jimmy sells his card to a memorabilia store, the place is burgled by two small-time thieves and the detective loses his card. They track down the thieves.
5/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NAH8qgVY9jE

"Crapped Out " - IMDB
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Thu Jan 30, 2020 3:15 pm


50th
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White chicks (2004)

After an unsuccessful mission, FBI agents Kevin Copeland and Marcus Copeland fall in disgrace in the agency. They decide to swap their bad position with his superior Section Chief Elliott Gordon working undercover in an abduction case, disguised in the two spoiled white daughters of a tycoon, Brittany and Tiffany Wilson, getting in hilarious situations.
5/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aeVkbNka9HM

"Imagine if the protagonists were white and pretending to be black... " - youtube
"White people haven’t been oppressed nor made a mockery of racially so that wouldn’t be the same at all" - youtube
"Havent been oppressed? Tell that to German Jews in WW2, the celts and gauls conquered by the romans, white slaves during ancient and medieval times, the irish and germans during the late 19th century...." - youtube
Gotta love youtube ;)
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Thu Jan 30, 2020 3:26 pm


49th
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Black Roses (1988)

In this dreadful low-budget horror film, a small town is up in arms over the arrival of a Satanic heavy-metal band called Black Roses to play at the local high school. The parents are right to be concerned, for the band has made a deal with the Devil and turns the teens into zombies who murder their parents. Reactionary and poorly-made, this comes off as a teen horror movie aimed at old people who think rock music is a menace. Julie Adams and Ken Swofford show up, but the 3-D video box is more interesting than the movie.
5/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cs8HubW4J3U&t=108s

"Never have there been so many mullets flaunted in one film " - IMDB
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Apex Predator » Thu Jan 30, 2020 5:59 pm

The stories that Kevin Smith could tell about Bruce Willis in Cop Out are more interesting than the film (Lethal Weapon 2 retread), although it WAS my first exposure to parkour.

Biggest sin of White Chicks isn't that it exists; it's that it doesn't take full advantage of the opportunities available to dive into the race discussion. Instead it deals with cheap stereotypes (white females and gays) while occasionally panning gold from the basement it mines its humor from (the dance-off, Terry Crews).
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Apex Predator » Thu Jan 30, 2020 6:01 pm

Rump wrote:
Thu Jan 30, 2020 3:15 pm

50th
White chicks (2004)


"Imagine if the protagonists were white and pretending to be black... " - youtube


Soul Man?

Loqueesha?

The latter came out just this past year. :roll:
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Thu Jan 30, 2020 8:10 pm

Apex Predator wrote:
Thu Jan 30, 2020 6:01 pm

Loqueesha?

:roll:
Just looked it up.. it has 1.2 rating on IMDB :D
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Thu Jan 30, 2020 8:57 pm


48th
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The Pool Boys (2009)

Alex is on his way to Harvard but needs a summer internship to qualify for a scholarship. When a job in D.C. falls through, he turns to his glib cousin, Roger, whom he thinks is an aquatic engineer. Roger is, in truth, a Beverly Hills pool boy who offers Alex a job and promises to invent an internship to fool Harvard. When a pool customer with a mansion goes on holiday for six weeks, Roger gets the idea to run a brothel and enlists Alex to keep the books. As the scholarship interview approaches, what could go wrong?
5/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BE3azQxdxeU&t=50s

"I had to join IMDb just to warn the world" - IMDB
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Captain Terror » Thu Jan 30, 2020 9:02 pm

Just realized we haven't even hit the 6/10's yet. Jesus, this was quite a month!
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Thu Jan 30, 2020 9:04 pm


47th
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Deformed Monsters (1997)

Undersized, Undead and Angry. Dracula. Frankenstein. The Werewolf. The Mummy. In an experiment of the maddest kind of science, these four classic monsters of film and literature are brought back to life...but something goes wrong. Though they look and act exactly as they you'd think they'd look, the creepy quartet emerge as half their normal size. Now, they're three feet tall...and not happy at all.
5/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rGJSzvUwypc

"for the love of god noooooooooooooooo " - IMDB
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Thu Jan 30, 2020 9:06 pm

Captain Terror wrote:
Thu Jan 30, 2020 9:02 pm
Just realized we haven't even hit the 6/10's yet. Jesus, this was quite a month!
It was bad movie month/s, i was looking for dances and slaps (which are usually in bad teen films)
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Thu Jan 30, 2020 9:13 pm


46th
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Transylmania (2009)

Moronic American student Rusty arranges a student exchange program for his closest friends and him to study in Romania for six months and meet his Internet girlfriend Draguta. He travels with potheads Pete and Wang, Pete's girlfriend Lia and her twin sister Danni, the naive and romantic Newmar and his dippy girlfriend Lynne, the nerd Brady and his sexually confused roommate Mike, and crook Cliff. His friends actually intend to party. While traveling by train to Razvan they learn that five hundred years ago the vampire Radu lost his beloved Stephania, whose spirit was trapped in a music box. Ever since, Radu has kept Stephania's body while seeking the music box to bring her back. One of Radu's minions has recently retrieved the music box but, mortally wounded by the vampire slayer Teodora Van Sloan, drops the object in a gypsy's basket. Newmar unwittingly buys the music box and gives it to Lynne, who opens it and is possessed by Stephania.
5/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LGqYpl0DiWc

"A rancidly unfunny yet pointlessly complex comedy with Ed Gein-level humor, rampant misogyny and homophobia, and a cast of 34-year-old college kids. " - rottentomatoes
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Wooley » Thu Jan 30, 2020 9:15 pm

Captain Terror wrote:
Thu Jan 30, 2020 9:02 pm
Just realized we haven't even hit the 6/10's yet. Jesus, this was quite a month!
I don't know how he does it.
I won't watch a movie if I suspect it's going to be bad (in any way other than cheap, cheesy horror and sci-fi). I mean, I haven't seen all the GOOD movies yet.
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Thu Jan 30, 2020 9:21 pm


45th
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House III (1989)

Detective Lucas McCarthy finally apprehends "Meat Cleaver Max" and watches the electric chair execution from the audience. But killing Max Jenke only elevated him to another level of reality. Now Lucas' family is under attack, his sanity in question, and his house haunted. Aided by a disreputable college professor, can Lucas reclaim his mind, house, and family? Features Lance Henriksen as Lucas McCarthy and Brion James as Max Jenke. One of the few movies featuring these actors as main characters, if not the only one.
5/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JvLY8r-gH-M

Why not just call it "A Nightmare on Shocker Street" :roll:
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Captain Terror » Thu Jan 30, 2020 9:22 pm

Rump wrote:
Thu Jan 30, 2020 9:06 pm
It was bad movie month/s,
Yes, that was very clear. :D
My post was meant as admiration of your stamina.
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Thu Jan 30, 2020 9:41 pm


44th
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Murder Mystery (2019)

When an NYC cop (Adam Sandler) finally takes his wife (Jennifer Aniston) on a long promised European trip, a chance meeting on the flight gets them invited to an intimate family gathering on the Super Yacht of elderly billionaire Malcolm Quince. When Quince is murdered, they become the prime suspects in a modern day whodunit.
5/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5YEVQDr2f3Q

"How anyone can give this over 2 stars was either watching this film very drunk or was one of the production team." - IMDB
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Thu Jan 30, 2020 9:46 pm


43rd
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Star Slammer (1986)

Gorgeous space traveller Taura (Sandy Brooke) is captured on the planet Arous (as in "The Brain From..."?) Taura is accused of a murder she didn't commit by Bantor (Ross Hagen) , chief flunkey of the all-powerful Inquisitor (Aldo Ray). She is incarcerated in an intergalactic prison ship, populated by beautiful, barely dressed woman. Thus does science fiction segue into "babes behind bars",complete with a sadistic female guard named Muffy (Dawn Wildsmith). Don't worry: you're not supposed to take this one seriously. John Carradine costars in this lively R-rated cheapie
5/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fZAqN87L71M

"This is a cheesy,low budget late 80's piece of crap. The opening score is a direct rip-off from Raiders/Lost Ark but changes every few notes so as not to be sued. Awful acting, some good gore, always threats of lesbianism but nothing to show for it, some strange costumes and "little people" running around with awful speeded-up voices." - IMDB
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Thu Jan 30, 2020 10:00 pm


42nd
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Just Visiting (2001)

A knight and his valet are plagued by a witch, and to repair the damage, they make use of the services of a wizard. Something goes wrong and they're transported from the 12th century to the year 2000, where they meets some of the knight's family, and slowly learns what the future's like. In order to return to the 12th century and deal with the witch, they begin to look for a wizard.
5/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Up243fcvFzM

"please please do not even consider THINKING about this movie, for you will break down into fits of hysterical nose bleeds and begin to have uncontrollable diarrhea." - IMDB
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Thu Jan 30, 2020 10:04 pm


41st
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Galaxina (1980)

The crew of the police cruiser Infinity is finally heading home after a long stay in deep space. Just when they think they are about to get some much needed rest and relaxation, the crew is given a new mission - journey to the alien world Altar One to find the Blue Star, a mystical gem that holds unlimited power. Their journey to find the Blue Star leads them to an outer space brothel full of alien women and a gang that worships Harley-Davidson motorcycles. Can Galaxina and the crew find the Blue Star and save the world and will the ship's pilot succumb to the beauty of the ship's sexy robot Galaxina.
5/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_3LRLeuEWEM

Image

Dat Ass!!! :)
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Thu Jan 30, 2020 10:15 pm


40th
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Ballistic: Ecks vs Sever (2002)

Jonathan Ecks, an FBI agent, realizes that he must join with his lifelong enemy, Agent Sever, a rogue DIA agent with whom he is in mortal combat, in order to defeat a common enemy. That enemy has developed a "micro-device" that can be injected into victims in order to kill them at will.
5/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tme_SdRv2gk&t=22s

"Once in a blue moon you watch a movie which is so awful, that u can't even find the words to describe it..." - IMDB

Dat Ass!!! :D
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Apex Predator » Fri Jan 31, 2020 1:37 am

You have far more patience with Transylmania than I did. It caused me to swear off movies for about a week after seeing it.

Also, less desire to see bad ones.
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Charles » Fri Jan 31, 2020 3:01 am

Rump wrote:
Thu Jan 30, 2020 10:00 pm

42nd
Image
Just Visiting (2001)

A knight and his valet are plagued by a witch, and to repair the damage, they make use of the services of a wizard. Something goes wrong and they're transported from the 12th century to the year 2000, where they meets some of the knight's family, and slowly learns what the future's like. In order to return to the 12th century and deal with the witch, they begin to look for a wizard.
5/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Up243fcvFzM

"please please do not even consider THINKING about this movie, for you will break down into fits of hysterical nose bleeds and begin to have uncontrollable diarrhea." - IMDB


I was going to say what the shit, but then I googled the title and saw it's a remake. I haven't seen that one. Did you see the original?
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Fri Jan 31, 2020 1:38 pm

Charles wrote:
Fri Jan 31, 2020 3:01 am
I was going to say what the shit, but then I googled the title and saw it's a remake. I haven't seen that one. Did you see the original?
I have a very very long time ago
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Death Proof » Fri Jan 31, 2020 2:09 pm

Rump wrote:
Thu Jan 30, 2020 9:21 pm

45th
Image
House III (1989)

Detective Lucas McCarthy finally apprehends "Meat Cleaver Max" and watches the electric chair execution from the audience. But killing Max Jenke only elevated him to another level of reality. Now Lucas' family is under attack, his sanity in question, and his house haunted. Aided by a disreputable college professor, can Lucas reclaim his mind, house, and family? Features Lance Henriksen as Lucas McCarthy and Brion James as Max Jenke. One of the few movies featuring these actors as main characters, if not the only one.
5/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JvLY8r-gH-M

Why not just call it "A Nightmare on Shocker Street" :roll:


Originally marketed as "The Horror Show". I'm actually a fan - Brion James (RIP) and Lance Henriksen are great in it.
Ain't no grave gonna hold this body down
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Death Proof » Fri Jan 31, 2020 2:11 pm

Rump wrote:
Thu Jan 30, 2020 10:15 pm

40th
Image
Ballistic: Ecks vs Sever (2002)

Jonathan Ecks, an FBI agent, realizes that he must join with his lifelong enemy, Agent Sever, a rogue DIA agent with whom he is in mortal combat, in order to defeat a common enemy. That enemy has developed a "micro-device" that can be injected into victims in order to kill them at will.
5/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tme_SdRv2gk&t=22s

"Once in a blue moon you watch a movie which is so awful, that u can't even find the words to describe it..." - IMDB

Dat Ass!!! :D


I didn't think it was that bad... as I recall, I did a live posting on RT while watching this. Lost in the mists of time, of course.

Always love Ray Park, anyway.
Ain't no grave gonna hold this body down
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Thu Feb 06, 2020 2:50 pm


39th
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Bad Channels (1992)

An alien lands in a small town and promptly takes over the local radio station. The disk jockey, Dan O' Dare, well known for his publicity stunts, becomes a hostage. The alien uses the radio station and Dan's amused audience to target and subsequently shrink women for his collection.
5/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ctG3GX2xng&t=31s

"This movie stinks on ice" - IMDB
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Thu Feb 06, 2020 2:59 pm


38th
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Journey to the Seventh Planet (1961)

A U.N. space expedition to the planet Uranus discovers a bizarrely familiar world right out of their own heads, featuring places and people the crew members recall from their past. It's all part of a fantasy created by the planet's master, a giant, pulsating brain that can also turn their worst thoughts into reality.
5/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0-Cix53XRVs&t=66s

"The rocket special effects were simply awful--consisting of a fuzzy rocket ship that appears to be cardboard flying across a terrible painting of space and later when it lands it is a child's plastic toy!" - IMDB :P
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Thu Feb 06, 2020 3:07 pm


37th
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The Pink Panther (2006)

Before thousands of enthusiastic spectators at the World Cup semi-finals between France and China, an elusive professional assassin murders the famous French coach, and manages, somehow, to steal from his hand his prized possession--the priceless Pink Panther diamond ring. Now, of all the Parisian Police Force's detectives, the deceitful Chief Inspector, Dreyfus, decides to appoint the maladroit investigator, Jacques Clouseau, to this difficult and mysterious case, knowing that the eccentric gendarme is way out of his depth. Does Dreyfus have a hidden agenda? Can France's clueless and most bumbling officer of the law piece together the scarce leads to pull off a surprising success?
5/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dKxgj5FxmZo

"I had been so excited before the show, especially since I had endured a heavily loaded week at work and school. I left the theater feeling seriously ripped off and sick, sick of attempting to giggle at the same old joke of a man getting kicked in the family jewels. I demanded my money back after the show" - IMDB
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Thu Feb 06, 2020 3:10 pm


36th
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Up the Creek (1984)

Bob McGraw is in his 12th year of college, goofing his way through life. Bob the slacker, Irwin the alcoholic geek, Gonzer the human food disposal and Max the ne'er do well are the four losers forced and bribed to represent their university in an intercollegiate raft race., They make some friends like the lovely Heather Merriweather, but mostly enemies, among others a whole team of marines, and preppy IVY-leaguers determined to win.
5/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bajEyqIV88I

D.P & Wooley :up:
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Thu Feb 06, 2020 3:22 pm


35th
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Brainscan (1994)

A lonely teenage horror-movie fan (Edward Furlong) discovers a mysterious computer game that uses hypnosis to custom-tailor the game into the most terrifying experience imaginable. When he emerges from the hypnotic trance he is horrified to find evidence that the brutal murder depicted in the game actually happened -- and he's the killer.
6/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CJwuX3m1Bcs

"Sorry Edward!!! I'd like to admit that I'm over 14 so it's not really aimed at me anyway...but I feel better having said that" - IMDB
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Rump
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Thu Feb 06, 2020 3:26 pm


34th
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Drive Thru (2007)

In Blanca Carne, California, the seventeen year-old student Mackenzie Carpenter is celebrating her graduation in high-school with her boyfriend Fisher Kent and her classmates. Mackenzie receives messages about her close friends while they are murdered by Horny The Clown, the symbol of the Hella-Burger fasts food. On the eve of her eighteenth birthday and after the death of a couple of friends, Mackenzie realizes that all of them are connected to a dark event in the past of her mother Marcia Carpenter. Further, she will be in danger on the day of her birthday.
6/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OJ4WmMtz44g

"Makes you want to poke out your own eyeballs with a rusty spoon." - IMDB
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Rump
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Thu Feb 06, 2020 3:39 pm


33rd
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My Babysitter's a Vampire (2010)

Ethan Morgan is a geeky freshman, not trusted by his parents to stay home alone with his little sister Jane. They hire Erica, a girl from Ethan's high school who is a huge fan of "Dusk", as a babysitter. However, Erica comes across her best friend Sarah, and Jesse, Sarah's vampire ex-boyfriend, on the night she is to babysit, and decides to attend a party that Jesse is throwing instead. During a fight between Sarah and Jesse, Sarah ends up at Ethan's house and tells Ethan's parents that she was asked to babysit instead. Ethan has a vision when touching Sarah, and notices she has no reflection in the mirror, leaving him suspicious of her. He confides this in his dorky best friend, Benny. Sarah leaves to get Erica back from the party, knowing the party is full of bloodthirsty vampires. Curious, the boys have Benny's grandmother watch over Jane while they follow Sarah. They see her feed on a rat and realize she is a vampire. Sarah quickly explains that she is only a fledgling, a vampire ...
6/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NUQ9_q6v4M4

"Blame canada" - youtube
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Thu Feb 06, 2020 3:46 pm


32nd
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Warlock III (1999)

A college student unexpectedly finds that she has inherited a derelict house. Accompanied by a group of friends, she goes there to clear it of heir-looms before the structure is demolished. Almost immediately, she and her friends are targeted by a powerful warlock who is very interested in her bloodline.
6/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2RUXG0JNw8U

"Ugh" - IMDB
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Rump
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Thu Feb 06, 2020 4:01 pm


31st
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I Spy (2002)

When the Switchblade, the most sophisticated prototype stealth fighter created yet, is stolen from the U.S. government, one of the United States' top spies, Alex Scott, is called to action. What he doesn't expect is to get teamed up with a cocky civilian, World Class Boxing Champion Kelly Robinson, on a dangerous top secret espionage mission. Their assignment: using equal parts skill and humor, catch Arnold Gundars, one of the world's most successful illegal arms dealers, and foil his treacherous plans for the plane.
6/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z-aZceoVnWw

"Though now I live in the US, I was born in Hungary and as if all Hungarians were smelly jerks who don't shave their armpits is simple premature, moronic, and above anything: extraordinarily amateurish. Just like our pathetic "director"" - IMDB :D
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Thu Feb 06, 2020 4:07 pm


30th
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Lap Dance (2014)

An aspiring actress makes a pact with her fiancé to take a job as an exotic dancer to care for her cancer stricken father. Once the pact the couple made is broken, their lives are changed forever. Based on the true story of director Greg Carter and his girlfriend prior to their moving to Los Angeles in 2005.
6/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QQrA3vyJzDk

The points are for hilarious awfulness.. it's like a hallmark movie with hooters :D
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Thu Feb 06, 2020 4:11 pm


29th
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The Dead Next Door (1989)

The government sets up a Zombie squad after an epidemic has made the world run rampant with living corpses. Raimi, Mercer, Kuller, and others head off to Ohio to try and find a cure to the epidemic but soon run into a crazy cult of zombie lovers who are set on preserving the zombies and letting a new world be born because they believe that it's God's will. When Mercer gets infected with the zombie virus, Raimi and the others must work quickly to find a cure and avoid the cult.
6/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nRpPDGHeFqs&t=54s

Crumbsroom & Jinnistan :up:
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Wooley
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Wooley » Thu Feb 06, 2020 4:14 pm

Rump wrote:
Thu Feb 06, 2020 3:10 pm

36th
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Up the Creek (1984)

Bob McGraw is in his 12th year of college, goofing his way through life. Bob the slacker, Irwin the alcoholic geek, Gonzer the human food disposal and Max the ne'er do well are the four losers forced and bribed to represent their university in an intercollegiate raft race., They make some friends like the lovely Heather Merriweather, but mostly enemies, among others a whole team of marines, and preppy IVY-leaguers determined to win.
5/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bajEyqIV88I

D.P :up:

Dude.
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by eri nitta » Thu Feb 06, 2020 4:17 pm

Rump wrote:
Thu Feb 06, 2020 4:11 pm

29th
Image
The Dead Next Door (1989)

The government sets up a Zombie squad after an epidemic has made the world run rampant with living corpses. Raimi, Mercer, Kuller, and others head off to Ohio to try and find a cure to the epidemic but soon run into a crazy cult of zombie lovers who are set on preserving the zombies and letting a new world be born because they believe that it's God's will. When Mercer gets infected with the zombie virus, Raimi and the others must work quickly to find a cure and avoid the cult.
6/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nRpPDGHeFqs&t=54s

Crumbsroom & Jinnistan :up:


:up:
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Thu Feb 06, 2020 4:22 pm


28th
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Jersey Shore Massacre (2014)

When Teresa and the girls leave their suburban New Jersey salon for a weekend of sun and sin down the shore, they are blindsided by a bizarre twist of events that catapult them from the sands of Seaside Heights to a secluded house deep in the New Jersey Pine Barrens. Frightened by stories of the legendary Jersey Devil, the local population of Pineys and a giant dim-witted neighbor, the girls eagerly return to Seaside Heights where they hook-up with five fist-pumping delinquents who incessantly disrespect all with their reprehensible behavior. As day turns to night, the group converges at a Seaside bar where they are soon ejected for inciting a dance-floor brawl. With nowhere else to go, the group retreats to the house in the Pine Barrens for a night of carnal delights. Blinded by their selfish pursuits, the group remains unaware that their long outstanding debt to humanity is about to be settled - with their lives.
6/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mncb6WX3VIA

"Jersey Shore Massacre reminds viewers that it's hardly the worst disaster to hit the region. But it gives the Hindenburg stiff competition" - rottentomatoes :D
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Apex Predator » Thu Feb 06, 2020 8:27 pm

Rump wrote:
Thu Feb 06, 2020 3:26 pm

34th
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Drive Thru (2007)

A lonely teenage horror-movie fan (Edward Furlong) discovers a mysterious computer game that uses hypnosis to custom-tailor the game into the most terrifying experience imaginable. When he emerges from the hypnotic trance he is horrified to find evidence that the brutal murder depicted in the game actually happened -- and he's the killer.
6/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OJ4WmMtz44g

"Makes you want to poke out your own eyeballs with a rusty spoon." - IMDB


Seen this one and I don't remember that much about it. The best joke is that Morgan Spurlock (Super Size Me) plays the fast food manager.

Description's wrong, by the way. :P
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Apex Predator » Thu Feb 06, 2020 8:30 pm

Rump wrote:
Thu Feb 06, 2020 3:07 pm

37th
Image
The Pink Panther (2006)

Before thousands of enthusiastic spectators at the World Cup semi-finals between France and China, an elusive professional assassin murders the famous French coach, and manages, somehow, to steal from his hand his prized possession--the priceless Pink Panther diamond ring. Now, of all the Parisian Police Force's detectives, the deceitful Chief Inspector, Dreyfus, decides to appoint the maladroit investigator, Jacques Clouseau, to this difficult and mysterious case, knowing that the eccentric gendarme is way out of his depth. Does Dreyfus have a hidden agenda? Can France's clueless and most bumbling officer of the law piece together the scarce leads to pull off a surprising success?
5/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dKxgj5FxmZo

"I had been so excited before the show, especially since I had endured a heavily loaded week at work and school. I left the theater feeling seriously ripped off and sick, sick of attempting to giggle at the same old joke of a man getting kicked in the family jewels. I demanded my money back after the show" - IMDB


The best part of the film is when

Clive Owen shows up.


More of that and less of Clouseau finding tiresome ways of mispronouncing hamburger.
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Fri Feb 07, 2020 12:06 pm

Apex Predator wrote:
Thu Feb 06, 2020 8:27 pm


Description's wrong, by the way. :P
Fixed :up:
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Re: Films i Saw Last Month From Crappiest to Greatest

Post by Rump » Sun Feb 09, 2020 9:10 am


27th
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Beware! The Blob (1972)

A technician brings a frozen specimen of the original Blob back from the North Pole. When his wife accidentally defrosts the thing, it terrorizes the populace, including the local hippies, kittens, and bowlers.
6/10
Trailer = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W6TdzeCerL4
Watch it Free in HD = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8-rr2LaWyeE

"I said hold the cranberry" :D
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